Upon further reflection, I think Dan needs to grow a long mustache, get some period clothes, and do some Sam Clemons shows for fundraising. I am not sure he can slow his speech down enough, but it would be fun to watch!
How about I show up to Thanksgiving next year in full on Mark Twain get-up. White mustache, white suit, drawling accent, and a snout-full of Axe Body spray. Ha!
- No one else thought it was a little odd that a 60-year-old man spent the whole afternoon with a 14-year-old girl? Just me?
- My feelings are mixed about using Keller's blindness as the butt of the joke. I guess if she was ok with it, it's ok, but it definitely feels a little like exploitation. It works, though, so hard to argue that part.
- I'm disturbed that a half-naked photo of Twain is floating around the interwebs. Also, you can't call yourself the Mark Twain of Substack and then post that picture. It's indecent!
From what I gather, lots of people thought it was weird that a 60 year old man wanted so desperately to be friends with teenage girls. He called them his "Angel fish." But from what I read, it was more of a father-daughter dynamic.
I go back and forth on his methods (hence the Axe Body spray aspect). It feels a bit tone deaf--even if he's the butt of the joke, it's easy to miss that if you're sitting in the audience laughing and listening.
Bare-chested Mark Twain is sort of ripped isn't he? Pecs in his 40s? Good for you, Mark Twain. I'll include him in my 2026 "Men of Fundraising for Breakfast" charity calendar. How many of those can I put you down for again, Renee?
Thanks, Mary Ann! I've heard rumors there's a photo of you in your 20s in a motorcycle magazine? Don't think I haven't been wracking my brain to figure out how to work that into a post! Fair warning!
Treatment for the blind and getting the proper funds raised for it, I agree is very important. I'd be concerned about how niche of a crowd those are who have direct experience to blindness or a close enough relationship with someone who experiences it, and how and to what extent can they understand how to contribute monetarily the most appropriate amount almost as if they consider not harshly, just practically "who's to say, since the experience of blindness the loved ones facing it, is not very common, nor may not be attributable to themselves either."
Right! That dynamic between what somebody experiences (say, blindness), a fundraiser (who wants to raise money to support the blind), and the donor (who feels compelled to help others) is such a tricky balance of direct experience, perception, and good intentions. There's lot of space in there for miscommunication or misperception. And while I admire Twain for getting on stage to do something for the blind, I think there's something to learn from him about maybe fundraising with a bit more care.
I had a line in the post that I eventually cut because it felt out of place. I said something like "Mark Twain fundraises like he's wearing rocket skates: he's fast, a little off kilter, but he looks like he's have a good time." It also makes him a little dangerous to everybody around him.
Thanks, Laurie! There must be some classical musicians out there who had to raise money from patrons to make the music we're still listening to. Send them my way and I'll write a post!
Kaitlyn, please don't encourage him. Dan, no one has ever referred to you as "the Mark Twain of Substack". Excellent post though, I really enjoyed it.
You don't know that, mother. Now, I'll grant you that I don't know that either, but if Kaitlyn wants to be sweet I think you should support her.
Upon further reflection, I think Dan needs to grow a long mustache, get some period clothes, and do some Sam Clemons shows for fundraising. I am not sure he can slow his speech down enough, but it would be fun to watch!
How about I show up to Thanksgiving next year in full on Mark Twain get-up. White mustache, white suit, drawling accent, and a snout-full of Axe Body spray. Ha!
As always, I have thoughts.
- No one else thought it was a little odd that a 60-year-old man spent the whole afternoon with a 14-year-old girl? Just me?
- My feelings are mixed about using Keller's blindness as the butt of the joke. I guess if she was ok with it, it's ok, but it definitely feels a little like exploitation. It works, though, so hard to argue that part.
- I'm disturbed that a half-naked photo of Twain is floating around the interwebs. Also, you can't call yourself the Mark Twain of Substack and then post that picture. It's indecent!
From what I gather, lots of people thought it was weird that a 60 year old man wanted so desperately to be friends with teenage girls. He called them his "Angel fish." But from what I read, it was more of a father-daughter dynamic.
I go back and forth on his methods (hence the Axe Body spray aspect). It feels a bit tone deaf--even if he's the butt of the joke, it's easy to miss that if you're sitting in the audience laughing and listening.
Bare-chested Mark Twain is sort of ripped isn't he? Pecs in his 40s? Good for you, Mark Twain. I'll include him in my 2026 "Men of Fundraising for Breakfast" charity calendar. How many of those can I put you down for again, Renee?
The figurative language in this post is A+ Mark Twain. I mean, Dan.
You're the only one who supports my delusions, Kaitlyn. Tell my mother I said so.
I cackled. I chuckled! I even had the effortlessly well timed care-free bursts of laughter.
Well done, King of Substanck
I appreciate it, Myrian! But I won't be happy until you snort. I know...I'm impossible to please. I'll work harder.
I love reading your writings every Monday. What a joy!
Thanks, Mary Ann! I've heard rumors there's a photo of you in your 20s in a motorcycle magazine? Don't think I haven't been wracking my brain to figure out how to work that into a post! Fair warning!
Treatment for the blind and getting the proper funds raised for it, I agree is very important. I'd be concerned about how niche of a crowd those are who have direct experience to blindness or a close enough relationship with someone who experiences it, and how and to what extent can they understand how to contribute monetarily the most appropriate amount almost as if they consider not harshly, just practically "who's to say, since the experience of blindness the loved ones facing it, is not very common, nor may not be attributable to themselves either."
Right! That dynamic between what somebody experiences (say, blindness), a fundraiser (who wants to raise money to support the blind), and the donor (who feels compelled to help others) is such a tricky balance of direct experience, perception, and good intentions. There's lot of space in there for miscommunication or misperception. And while I admire Twain for getting on stage to do something for the blind, I think there's something to learn from him about maybe fundraising with a bit more care.
I had a line in the post that I eventually cut because it felt out of place. I said something like "Mark Twain fundraises like he's wearing rocket skates: he's fast, a little off kilter, but he looks like he's have a good time." It also makes him a little dangerous to everybody around him.
Very well said.
Wonderful story. Thanks, Dan!
Thanks, Laurie! There must be some classical musicians out there who had to raise money from patrons to make the music we're still listening to. Send them my way and I'll write a post!
Will nose around,
Great review of historical figures. Much enjoyed.